Bailz Has a Blog

Tag: gentle productivity

  • Unlearning the Urge to Rush

    Unlearning the Urge to Rush

    ✨ Hey, hi, hello! Happy Wednesday!

    Yesterday’s therapy appointment went really well. I learned more about what our sessions will look like going forward — how we’ll approach things as they come up, how we’ll communicate, and how we’ll co-create this healing process. She gave me a few handouts for reference, and honestly? It felt fun to get a little nerdy together and lean into learning.

    After therapy, I headed to Costco for my little “present and mindful” field trip… and it went GREAT. I found almost everything I needed, I didn’t get overwhelmed, and I got in and out with zero panic. That is a huge win for me.

    When I got home, I put everything away, made myself some dinner, and waited for Heath to get home. We spent a cozy night together — one episode of Great British Baking Show, then reading side-by-side on the couch before winding down for bed. Pure comfort.

    🌅 This Morning Felt Different — In the Best Way

    Last night, I got myself into bed on time. I still struggled to fall asleep (my brain loves to party), but I honored my routine anyway. And this morning… I felt more on track than I have in a while.

    My alarm went off and instead of the usual groan of “ugh, already?” — I just stretched, snuggled the dogs for a minute, and got up. I stepped outside for a few minutes of sunlight, then came back in for morning pages, affirmations, breakfast shake, and supplements. After that, I got dressed and headed to the chiropractor.

    Slow, steady, grounded. It felt good.

    ⚡️ The Constant Urge to Rush — and Undoing It

    Something I’m actively working on right now is my lifelong habit of rushing… through everything.

    Brushing my teeth. Making breakfast. Reading a book. Cleaning the house. Watching a show. Doing yoga. Even resting.

    There’s this relentless voice in my head saying:

    “Go! Go! Go! Faster! Faster! Faster!”

    Heart racing. Jaw clenched. Muscles tight. Breath shallow.
    Even when there’s no urgency, my body behaves like something terrible is chasing me.

    So I’m learning to catch myself in those moments — to pause, breathe deeply, and remind myself:

    “I am safe. Nothing is chasing me. This can take as long as it takes.”

    This morning, I intentionally slowed down while getting ready.
    No frantic energy. No rushing. No panicked clock-checking.

    And leaving the house actually felt… calm.

    🚨 A Little Dog Drama

    About halfway to my chiropractor appointment, I got a notification that the back door had opened — the house alarm was going off.

    My stomach dropped.

    Then I remembered:
    If the back door isn’t locked, the boys can let themselves out. (Too smart for their own good.)

    I turned the alarm off from my phone and called Heath, panicking a little. He checked the cameras and confirmed it was just the dogs doing their thing. We agreed: I’d still go to my appointment and then head straight home.

    So I skipped my original plans of going to the coffee shop after (tomorrow’s treat!) and went straight back home drove back after the appointment instead.

    The boys were SO proud of themselves, completely unaware of the chaos they caused. Honestly… thank goodness they’re so cute.

    🌿 Rest, Reading, and Beatles

    The rest of my afternoon was slow and restorative.

    I tried reading a little bit of my newest fantasy read, A Winter’s Promise, but my brain felt scattered. Instead of forcing it, I curled up on the couch and let myself rest — half nap, half meditation, all peaceful.

    No shame. No “shoulds.”
    Just quiet.

    When I felt ready, I made a Mediterranean chopped salad (my current obsession) and then got on the walk pad for my 45 minutes.

    While I walked, I started Get Back on Disney+ — the Beatles documentary. After finishing Shout! the other day, I knew it was time for a rewatch. Watching them create songs out of thin air is magic. Pure magic.

    🗺 Planning My Guthrie Reset Trip

    After my walk, I finally sat down to plan something I’ve been wanting to do for a while: a solo overnight trip to Guthrie next week.

    If you know me, you know Guthrie is my happy place — the preserved Victorian architecture, the history, the slower pace, the memories tied to my ancestors and our wedding… it feels like home.

    I booked an Airbnb, messaged a couple of friends up there, and started planning my little itinerary:

    • Breakfast at my favorite spot
    • Walks around downtown
    • Visiting familiar faces
    • Solo writing time
    • A nice steak dinner
    • Rest, reflection, inspiration

    I can’t even tell you how excited I am.

    🌙 Tonight’s Plan

    For the rest of the day, I’m staying on theme: slow, intentional, restorative.

    A moderate yoga practice along with some piano practice as well.
    Some reading or more of Get Back.
    No rushing.
    No forcing.
    Just presence and ease.

    It might be simple, but honestly?

    That’s the kind of life I’ve always wanted.

    💬 Let’s Talk

    What’s one small thing you do (or want to do) to help yourself slow down and be more present in your day?

    ✨ Stay Connected

    If you enjoy following along on my healing journey, I’d love to have you as a subscriber. You’ll get all new posts delivered straight to your inbox — gentle words, honest reflections, and lots of cozy magic.

    Subscribe below to stay connected. 💜

    Love always, Bailz 💜

  • ✨ One Month In: Expanding or Distracting?

    Today marks one month since I officially launched this blog. One month of showing up, writing, sharing, and growing — and of learning a lot about myself along the way. 💜

    When I started, my goal was simple: document the journey honestly. Not just the shiny parts, but the messy, uncertain, vulnerable middle too. And that’s what I’ve tried to do.

    🌙 The Drift I Noticed

    Over the past week, I felt myself quietly shifting away from the heart of this project. I was focusing more on talking about the work than doing the work. I caught myself refreshing notifications instead of reflecting, chasing validation instead of connection. 📱

    At the same time, I’d fallen off my movement routine — fewer walks, less yoga — and my clarity went with it. The fog, the fatigue, the self-doubt crept back in. I know that pattern.

    🌿 The Reset

    So I stepped away for a few days. Fewer screens. More breath. More sunlight. More fetch with the dogs. More gentle movement. I let myself recalibrate. And it helped — I feel clearer, lighter, more like myself again. ☀️🐾

    ✨ What One Month Taught Me

    • Self-discovery isn’t only about expanding; sometimes it’s about contracting and coming home to stillness.
    • Healing doesn’t happen on a screen — the screen can be a doorway, but the work is done in my body, breath, choices, and days. 🫁
    • Movement is medicine. When I move, my mind softens and my spirit returns.
    • Rest isn’t quitting; it’s part of the process. 🌙

    💜 Month Two: My Intention

    I’m going to keep showing up — not for algorithms or approval, but for myself. I’ll stay anchored in my why, let rest count as progress, and do the work even when no one sees it.

    Here’s to one month down, and many more months of showing up — imperfectly, intentionally, and with an open heart. Thank you for being here. You matter more than you know. 🌸

    Love always, Bailz 💜

  • ✨ Better, Not Perfect ✨

    ✨ Better, Not Perfect ✨

    Today has been one of those days that perfectly captures what this whole journey is about — learning to listen to myself, honor my energy, and follow inspiration when it shows up.

    🌙 Gentle Intentions

    This morning, I woke up feeling heavy — emotionally, mentally, energetically. I had what Brené Brown calls a vulnerability hangover. The last few days have been full of openness, honesty, and sharing my truth in big, public ways. It’s all been good — but it’s also been a lot.

    So I decided to post a TikTok earlier today talking about that. About how tired and tender I felt. About the importance of being gentle with myself when I’m stretched thin from growth. I didn’t script it, I didn’t overthink it — I just spoke honestly from where I was.

    @bailzhasablog

    Day 2 of whatever this is?

    ♬ original sound – bailzhasablog

    After posting, I expected to feel depleted. Instead… I felt lighter. Seen. Proud. Something shifted.

    🔥 Following the Spark

    That tiny act of showing up authentically — even while scared, even while tired — gave me a spark of energy. I didn’t plan to do anything big today. My only goal was to rest and be gentle with myself. But as the day went on, that spark grew.

    Before I knew it, I found myself tidying the house. I didn’t do it because I had to — I did it because I wanted to. Because my space needed love, and so did I. Cleaning didn’t feel like punishment; it felt like self-care.

    And somewhere between doing the dishes and vacuuming, I had an idea for another TikTok. One that felt alive.

    💜 Showing Up Again

    So I set up my phone and recorded it: “Five Things About Me.”

    It wasn’t perfect, it wasn’t fancy, but it was me — raw, real, and a little bit weird. And it felt good. Not in a dopamine-rush, validation-seeking way, but in a soul feels lighter kind of way.

    I didn’t post because I felt obligated or because I was chasing momentum — I posted because I felt inspired. Because I felt better, so I did better.

    @bailzhasablog

    5 things to know about Bailz! Thanks for being here 💜 #recoveringpeoplepleaser #audhd #witchywoman #writer #artist

    ♬ original sound – bailzhasablog

    🌿 The Lesson

    Today reminded me that healing isn’t linear, but it is responsive. When I nurture myself instead of forcing productivity, I actually create energy instead of depleting it.

    That’s what I want more of.
    Not perfect days. Just better ones.
    Days that honor where I’m at while leaving space for what could bloom from there.

    So if you’re reading this and you’ve been hard on yourself lately — please remember: you don’t have to do everything. You just have to do one gentle, honest thing for yourself. The rest will follow. 🌸

    Love always,

    Bailz 💜

    Thank you for being here — truly. If you want to follow along as I keep learning, healing, and showing up (even when it’s scary), you can subscribe below to have each new post sent straight to your inbox.

  • ⚖️ I Lost My Balance

    ⚖️ I Lost My Balance

    Yesterday, we got home from a long weekend in Guthrie, Oklahoma. We were married there six months ago, and it felt wonderful to be back—to revisit the place where we said “I do,” to celebrate, and to spend quality time with some of the beautiful people we’ve met along the way. Truly, it was a gift.

    That being said… even though it was a joyful trip, I lost my balance.

    🥄 Travel + Appetite = A Familiar Pattern

    One of my biggest ongoing struggles when I travel is food. My appetite tends to disappear almost entirely. It’s like a switch gets flipped. And while it’s happening, I usually don’t acknowledge it as a problem. For the first few days, I feel fine. I nibble here and there—maybe one meal a day—and pretend it’s no big deal. I’m caught up in the change of scenery, in the excitement of where we are and who we’re with. Food just doesn’t feel like a priority.

    This trip was no different.

    🥃 Too Little Fuel, Too Much Bourbon

    Not only was I under-fueling my body, but I was also drinking a fair amount. I told myself it was for special occasions, that it was social, that we were on vacation and “no harm, no foul.” And at first, that story worked. But now, with some space and clarity, I can see that I overdid it—and I’m feeling the effects. Not just physically, but emotionally and mentally. Deeply.

    😵‍💫 No Sleep, No Stillness

    Sleep didn’t come easy either. Each night, I woke up multiple times—my thoughts racing, anxiety buzzing through my body, tossing and turning for hours. I wasn’t able to rest, and I wasn’t giving myself space to recharge. I was operating in “go mode” without pressing pause.

    Looking back, I realize I abandoned many of the gentle, grounding practices that have been helping me so much lately. I didn’t write. I didn’t read. I didn’t prioritize rest. I wasn’t even high-fiving myself in the mirror.

    I was so focused on making the most of the trip, I ended up neglecting the progress I’ve been so intentionally making. And I started “should-ing” all over myself. I ignored the signs. I pushed through the fatigue. And I didn’t listen to what my body or heart was trying to say.

    😔 The Breaking Point

    It’s been a very long time since I’ve drunkenly cried in a bar bathroom —but yep, that happened on Saturday night. I was that girl. And honestly? I’m embarrassed.

    I lost myself a bit. I made choices I’m not proud of. And they feel heavy. I didn’t give myself enough recovery time between social activities. I didn’t pause. I didn’t refuel. I didn’t check in with my own needs. I just kept going and going until I ran out of steam—and then kept going anyway.

    🌫️ Shame & Burnout

    As I sit down to write this post, I feel… off. Disappointed. Drained. A little ashamed. And lost.

    But I also know this: I’m not broken. I didn’t ruin anything. I just lost my balance. And balance, thankfully, can always be restored.

    🌀 Coming Back to Center

    Today marks the beginning of my return to equilibrium. I’ve been resting. Hydrating. Taking slow breaths. Reminding myself to be gentle, even when that voice in my head wants to be harsh.

    This is the work. It’s not always pretty, and it’s not always linear. But this is the practice: falling out of alignment, noticing it, and lovingly guiding myself back.

    If you’ve ever lost your footing after doing something brave, exciting, or exhausting—if you’ve ever felt like you “should have known better”—I want you to know: me too. And it’s okay.

    We find our balance again. One breath, one nourishing bite, one kind thought at a time.

    Thanks for holding space for my honesty. Here’s to the messy middle, and to the comeback.

    As always, thank you for being here! Stay tuned for more tales from the life of Bailz 💜

  • 🧼 So Fresh and So Clean

    🧼 So Fresh and So Clean

    One of the many goals I’ve set for myself on this journey is to keep my space consistently clean and calm. A tidy space helps me feel grounded, clear-headed, and proud of my environment—which is something I’m actively learning to prioritize.

    While I’ve been doing a pretty good job overall, I’ll admit: the weekend got a little cluttered. So today, I decided it was time for a home reset.

    🧳 Getting Ready to Travel

    We’re heading out of town in a few days, and that added some extra motivation. I wanted to leave the house feeling fresh and welcoming for our return. So I spent the day cycling through the classic checklist:

    • 🧺 Laundry
    • 🛏️ Changed the sheets
    • 🍽️ Did the dishes
    • 🪴 Watered the plants
    • 🧹 Dusted and decluttered
    • 🧳 Packed what I could
    • 🧼 Vacuumed and mopped the floors

    It felt so good to go from room to room and really care for the space I call home. Not perfectly—just intentionally.

    🎧 A Little Hygge, A Little Mel

    I’ve also been multitasking a bit. While I cleaned, I listened to two episodes of the Mel Robbins podcast and started the audiobook The Little Book of Hygge. Both were excellent companions for my day and helped me feel like I was nourishing my environment and my mindset. Win-win.

    🗣️ The Inner Critic Tried to Interrupt

    As much as I tried to be present, my inner critic made sure I knew she was still in the room. Mid-dusting, she started whispering:

    “Hey… you haven’t written your blog post yet. When are you going to do that? You HAVE to do it.”

    Oof.

    I gently reminded her—many times—that I can only do one thing at a time. Right now, I’m cleaning. I’ll write when I’m done. I’ll worry about writing when I’m done.

    Was it easy? No. I had to shush her constantly. But I kept pulling my attention back to the present moment, and slowly, it got easier. That’s what this is: practice. One intentional breath, one focused task at a time.

    🪞 Gentle Progress, Not Perfection

    This isn’t going to be an overnight transformation. Silencing my inner critic—learning to trust myself—will take time. But I believe it’s worth the effort. Every time I interrupt that anxious voice with compassion and presence, I’m making progress.

    I’m learning that I can be gentle with myself and consistent with my goals. I don’t have to be perfect to be proud. I just have to keep showing up—one step at a time, one day at a time.

    Thank you for being here. I’m so glad we’re doing this together 💜