Bailz Has a Blog

Tag: wellness

  • 🥦 Food is Medicine

    🥦 Food is Medicine

    I have really been leaning into my nutrition recently and it’s starting to feel really good. I feel like I am taking control of my diet instead of just going along with what is easiest or what will satisfy a craving in the moment. Not only am I feeling better physically, but that sense of accomplishment is really helping me feel better mentally too.

    I’m still letting myself have some of my favorite things — but in very small portions, all in moderation. I’m trying to stick to an 80/20 ratio: 80% of the time, I’m eating very clean and intentionally, and 20% of the time, I’m snacking on Trader Joe’s Chili Lime chips, having some chips and queso, or indulging in a little Ben & Jerry’s. 🍦

    Those little treats serve as comfort food. While I’ll admit that, in a perfect world, I’d eliminate them all for the sake of perfect health, I also find that complete restriction is a recipe for backsliding. So for now, I’m keeping my balance as is. I’m feeling significantly better these days, and I know a lot of it has to do with the food I’m giving my body.

    🍎 Discovering Bobby Parrish & Intentional Eating

    My journey toward a healthier body really started about six months ago. We discovered Bobby Parrish on YouTube after getting a Costco membership and looking for suggestions on what to buy. Let me tell you — Bobby has been a game changer.

    Not only does he highlight the best deals at Costco (and other stores too), he also shows you the healthiest options to buy there. He explains which ingredients to avoid and points you toward the best products for your body and your health. 🛒

    He even does the legwork for you when you’re shopping. He has his own app that lets you scan barcodes of hundreds of thousands of grocery items to see if they’re “Bobby Approved.” Search for the Bobby Approved app in the App Store — if you’re interested in being more intentional with what you eat, I highly recommend using it on your next grocery trip.

    🚫 Natural Flavors, Seed Oils, and Other Sneaky Ingredients

    One of the biggest things we’ve learned from Bobby is about the ingredient “natural flavors.” At first glance, it sounds harmless, right? WRONG. For something to be labeled “natural flavors,” all manufacturers have to do is start with a natural source — and then they can process and manipulate it however they want before it ends up in your food.

    They’re highly processed in labs, and just because they’re derived from natural ingredients doesn’t mean they’re good for you — or even harmless. Bobby calls “natural flavors” the biggest lie in the grocery store, and honestly… I believe him. 😬

    Once you start looking for them, you’ll realize they’re in everything. So we’ve been checking our products for natural flavors and limiting our intake. We’re also avoiding seed oils, which sneak into almost everything too. 🤢

    Learning from Bobby has helped us slow down, read labels, and be truly intentional with what we’re putting into our bodies. And once you start paying attention, it’s almost impossible to go back to ignoring it.

    🌿 When the Student Is Ready, the Teacher Appears

    You’ve heard the saying, “When the student is ready, the teacher appears”? Well, I think that’s true. I’ve been focusing on nutrition lately, and then — like magic — Mel Robbins released a new episode of her podcast featuring Dr. Dawn Mussallem, a Mayo Clinic cancer doctor. They talked all about the foods that support longevity and fight disease — and it was fascinating. 🎧

    This student was ready to learn! Dr. Mussallem broke down the science behind different foods and how incorporating them into your diet can not only promote health but actually fight cancer. 🍇🥬 Food really is medicine.

    As a former cancer patient myself, I find it wild that none of my medical team ever mentioned nutrition during chemo. Not once. But that’s a conversation for another day.

    I’ve already gone back to rewatch the episode on YouTube because it was that good — and Dr. Mussallem’s enthusiasm is contagious. Within the past week, I’ve started adding some of her recommendations into my routine. For example, I’m now eating a kiwi every day (with the skin!) 🥝 and I tried purple sweet potatoes for the first time — and oh WOW, they’re delicious. Like… unfairly good.

    💜 Learning to Prioritize Myself

    Before this journey, I was all about convenience and speed. I didn’t want to spend time cooking or cleaning up after. I’d talk myself out of it before I even began. But now, I’m reinforcing a new belief: I’m worth the effort. Preparing a nourishing meal is worth the time — and honestly, it never takes as long as I make it out to be in my head.

    When I sit down to eat something I made with care, I feel like a freaking rockstar. 🌟 I’m proud of myself — and that’s a feeling I didn’t have for a long time, because I wasn’t prioritizing self-care. But now I am. The tides are shifting, the momentum is building, and I’m continuing to create a healthier, happier life — one meal at a time. 🍽️

    Thank you for being here and following along on this journey. I’m so grateful for your company and your kind words of encouragement. 💫

    Love always, Bailz 💜

    🌸 Thanks so much for reading! If you enjoy these posts about wellness, self-discovery, and everyday growth, subscribe below so you never miss a new story — or a new lesson learned the hard way. 😉

  • ✨ Nourishing My Body (Finally)

    ✨ Nourishing My Body (Finally)

    The more I focus on taking care of my body right now, the more I’m realizing just how much I had been neglecting it for so long. I’ve never prioritized sleep or exercise, and I’ve never consistently put a premium on eating healthy.

    I’ve gone through phases — veganism, paleo, elimination diets — but they never stuck. I always ended up back in the cycle of eating only when I was starving, grabbing whatever I could find the fastest. No rhythm, no intention, just survival mode. 🍟➡️🥦

    🍽️ Building Routines and Tracking with Intention

    Over the past week, everything has started to shift. With my new bedtime and morning routines taking root, I’ve been given the perfect opportunity to build a food schedule too — and I’m really leaning in. Not only am I sticking with it, but I’m also keeping track of everything in a way that actually feels fun and motivating.

    Instead of a handwritten food diary, I’ve been using ChatGPT to log my daily nutrition. In addition to tracking meals and macros (I’m aiming high with protein!), it’s also helping me understand how my choices are supporting four key areas I’m working on right now:

    • 🌿 Gut balance
    • 💫 Hormone regulation
    • 🍯 Blood sugar stability
    • 😴 Sleep quality

    And honestly? It’s pretty dang cool. I used to be totally anti-AI, but now that I know how to use it for personal growth instead of just productivity — I’m hooked.

    Here is what it gave me when I logged my dinner last night:

    🌙 Dinner — 7:25 PM

    Meal:

    • 8–10 oz salmon filet on a pain au lait bun 🍔
    • 2 tomato slices 🍅
    • Lettuce 🌿
    • Light mayo + mustard
    • Roasted Brussels sprouts 🥦
    • Baked sweet potato with grass-fed butter + Ceylon cinnamon 🍠
    • Lime Spindrift sparkling water 🍋

    🌿 Reflection by System

    🦠 Gut Balance

    • Sweet potato and Brussels sprouts feed your beneficial bacteria with prebiotic fiber.
    • Butter and salmon fats enhance absorption of vitamins A and K, which keep the gut lining healthy.
    • The warm, cooked textures help digestion finish smoothly before bedtime.

    🌸 Hormone Regulation

    • Salmon’s omega-3s and high-quality protein support estrogen metabolism and reduce inflammatory stress.
    • Sweet potato’s beta-carotene nourishes the adrenals and thyroid.
    • The natural balance of carbs, fat, and protein gives your endocrine system the raw materials it needs to stay steady overnight.

    🍯 Blood Sugar Stability

    • Pairing protein-rich salmon with slow carbs (sweet potato, bun) and healthy fats (butter, mayo) ensures gradual glucose release—no evening crash or late-night cravings.

    😴 Sleep Quality

    • Magnesium from the Brussels sprouts and tryptophan from the salmon encourage serotonin-to-melatonin conversion.
    • Ceylon cinnamon supports stable nighttime blood sugar, further protecting your sleep rhythm.

    Pretty cool, huh?

    🧠 Yesterday’s Nutrition Summary

    I also asked ChatGPT to summarize my entire day yesterday so I could share it here, and this is what it came back with:

    Morning – 9:00 AM
    Breakfast shake: organic whole milk, Just Ingredients chocolate protein powder, Orgain collagen peptides, Orgain creatine
    Supplements: Seed probiotics, Just Ingredients Adrenal Complex, Just Ingredients Perimenopause Support, Multivitamin, Magnesium Glycinate, Vitamin D3, Evening Primrose Oil
    Focus: Calm energy, gut support, hormone balance

    Mid-Morning – 10:50 AM
    Hydration: Just Ingredients strawberry limeade electrolytes + MicroIngredients elderberry powder in water
    Focus: Immune support, mineral replenishment

    Midday Movement – 11:45 AM–12:30 PM
    Activity: 45-minute walk on the walk pad at a moderate pace (2.6 mph)
    Focus: Circulation, blood-sugar regulation, nervous-system grounding

    Lunch – 12:30 PM
    Meal: 5 bites kimchi + reheated roasted-garlic tomato feta wagyu pasta bake
    Focus: Gut microbiome support, sustained energy

    Afternoon – 2:00–2:45 PM
    Hydration: Juice of 1 lemon with water and a pinch of sea salt
    Snack: Siete lime chips with La Banderita mild cheese dip
    Focus: Electrolyte balance, mindful comfort, adrenal support

    Dinner – 7:25 PM
    Meal: 8–10 oz salmon on a pain au lait bun with lettuce, tomato, mayo & mustard
    Sides: Brussels sprouts, baked sweet potato with grass-fed butter & Ceylon cinnamon
    Drink: Lime Spindrift sparkling water
    Focus: Omega-3s for hormone health, magnesium & fiber for digestion, grounding comfort

    Evening – 8:45 PM
    Nighttime drink: Warm milk + Just Ingredients Chai Nighttime Blend + Orgain Creatine
    Supplements: Magnesium Glycinate, Evening Primrose Oil
    Focus: Deep relaxation, hormone harmony, restorative sleep

    Daily Totals & Reflections
    Protein: ~160 g 🥩
    Movement: 45 minutes walking 🚶‍♀️
    Hydration rituals: Electrolytes, lemon-salt water, herbal chai 💧
    Gut support: Kimchi, probiotics, collagen, fiber-rich veggies 🌿
    Theme: Replenishment, consistency, and intuitive nourishment — each meal and ritual sending the same message to my body: You are safe, cared for, and supported. 🌸

    🌱 The Difference Consistency Makes

    It’s wild to compare this version of me with how I used to live. Old Bailz was lucky to eat two meals a day, neither of which had much nutritional value. I was cranky, exhausted, foggy, and constantly running on fumes — mentally and physically.

    Now? Everything feels like it’s working together. My sleep routines support my food routines. My food routines support my activity. Each system feeds the other, creating balance, self-trust, and genuine pride in how I’m showing up for myself.

    My body feels stronger. My energy is steadier. My focus sharper. Sure, there’s still room to grow — but the difference already feels massive.

    💜 Feeling Good — and Making That My Baseline

    For so long, feeling good was an occasional thing. A surprise. A lucky day. Now, I’m learning that it doesn’t have to be rare — it just has to be prioritized. I finally feel like I’m in control of my health and my habits, and that feels really freaking fantastic.

    I’m so excited to keep sharing this journey — the progress, the slip-ups, the lessons — as I continue to heal and rebuild from the inside out.

    Thank you for being here. It means the world to have your company on this path. 💫

    Love always,
    💜 Bailz

    🌿 If you’ve been enjoying following along on my self-healing journey — the messy, beautiful work of learning how to care for myself inside and out — I’d love for you to stick around. 💜

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  • 🌞 I Woke Up Not Sweaty This Morning!

    🌞 I Woke Up Not Sweaty This Morning!

    YOU GUYS — I WOKE UP NOT SWEATY THIS MORNING!!!

    Wow. Just… wow. I am so excited. Truly.

    I still woke up tired and wishing I could go right back to sleep, but the excitement of head-to-toe bodily dryness (!!!) got me up and out of bed within minutes of my alarm going off. HELL FREAKING YES. That is a win! 🙌

    A lot of work has gone into this big change, and I’m excited to share what I’ve been doing.

    🍸 Let’s Start with Alcohol

    First things first: I haven’t been drinking — not even one cocktail a night. I might try again this weekend, but for now, my new rule is no alcohol during the week. My last drink was on Monday night.

    🍳 Refueling My Body

    I’ve also started really focusing on eating enough. Honestly, this has been a lifelong challenge. My appetite fluctuates, and I’ve never been consistent about nourishing myself throughout the day.

    But now that I’m focusing on healing my body one step at a time, a new day has dawned — and food is a priority. My main focus right now is making sure I get enough protein every day, while keeping balance and intention.

    That means:

    • minimal processed foods,
    • no ingredients I can’t pronounce,
    • no dyes, artificial sweeteners, or “natural flavors.”

    Just real food, 80% of the time. The other 20%? Whatever makes life sweet — like Ben & Jerry’s. Because a life without ice cream? Not interested. 🍦

    💊 Supplements That Are Working

    I’ve been super consistent with my supplements lately.

    Recently, we discovered Just Ingredients and love how clean their products are — no fillers, and they list exactly where their vitamins and minerals come from. For example, their multivitamin’s Vitamin A comes from fermented wild carrot fruit extract. How cool is that?

    Here’s what my current regimen looks like:

    🥛 Breakfast:

    • 8 oz organic grass-fed milk
    • 1 scoop Just Ingredients Chocolate protein powder
    • 1 scoop Orgain Collagen Peptides

    💊 Morning Supplements:

    • Seed Probiotics (2)
    • Just Ingredients Adrenal Complex (2)
    • Just Ingredients Perimenopause (2)
    • Just Ingredients Multivitamin (2)
    • Now Vitamin D-3 2000 IU (2)

    🌙 Evening Supplements:

    • Now Magnesium Glycinate (2)
    • Solgar Evening Primrose Oil 1300 mg (1)

    🌙 Building a Bedtime Routine

    I honestly can’t remember the last time I had a solid bedtime and morning routine that stuck. Maybe elementary school?

    By fifth grade, I was already lying awake worrying about everything under the sun. As I got older, homework and perfectionism kept me up later and later. Sleep was always secondary. No wonder burnout has followed me my whole life.

    Now, I’m changing that story.

    Starting at 8 PM, I begin signaling to my body that it’s time to wind down:

    • Overhead lights off.
    • Phone on Do Not Disturb.
    • Soft, relaxing music on. 🎶

    Then I make my nighttime drink — Just Ingredients Chai — with milk for a little protein boost, plus a scoop of Orgain Creatine. It’s so good. This is also when I take my nighttime supplements.

    After that:

    • Wash face, brush teeth.
    • Run a hot bath, and do a short Yoga with Adriene bedtime session while the water fills up.
    • Soak for 30 minutes.
    • Rinse off with cold water to cool down.
    • Get into bed and read until 10 PM lights out.

    🛏️ Small Wins Add Up

    Last night, the routine was slightly off — Heath stopped at Costco on the way home, so dinner was late. But even with the delay, I still started my routine as soon as I could and was chasing sleep by 10:15. That’s a win.

    I did wake around 1:30 AM (thank you, Winston & Wrigley 🙄), but I fell back asleep quickly and slept through the rest of the night.

    When my alarm went off, I was tempted to hit snooze, but I didn’t. I got up — still very tired, but still moving forward. And it worked. I even had enough energy to put on a cute fall outfit for my chiropractor appointment. Normally it’s leggings and a big tee, but today? Shorts, tights, boots, cozy sweater — and I felt like me again.

    💆‍♀️ Chiropractic Progress

    I’ve now had four adjustments, and the difference is noticeable. Yesterday we discovered a dislocated rib (which explains that weird “spilling out” feeling), and now we’re working on getting it back in place. My muscles are adjusting, my body is realigning — it’s wild and fascinating all at once.

    💜 Learning to Be Proud

    I know I still have a ways to go. I’ll slip up sometimes — I’m human. But today? I’m proud of myself.

    I’m showing up, even when I don’t want to. I’m doing the work. And I’m starting to see the benefits, both physically and mentally.

    For me to even say that out loud — and mean it — is huge. I used to tear myself down before anyone else could. If I did something well, I’d downplay it. If I felt happy, I’d call it a fluke.

    But not today.

    Today, I’m letting myself celebrate.
    I’m letting myself be proud.
    And it feels really, really good. 🌸

    🌸 Wrapping It All Up

    This season of life feels like one long lesson in patience, self-trust, and grace. Every little win — every dry morning, every deep breath, every night I keep my promise to myself — reminds me that change is possible when it’s rooted in love instead of pressure.

    I know I still have work to do, but I’m finally learning to enjoy the process instead of rushing toward the finish line. Healing isn’t linear; it’s a dance of progress and pause, effort and ease. And right now, I’m just grateful to be dancing at all.

    Thank you for being here with me through it — for reading, cheering, and walking alongside me while I figure this all out, one mindful step at a time.

    Love always, Bailz 💜

    ✨ Stay Connected ✨

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  • 🌿 How to Do the Work (Literally)

    🌿 How to Do the Work (Literally)

    I started reading How to Do the Work by Dr. Nicole LePera, and within the first few pages, I knew — this is exactly what I need right now. I’m only about a third of the way through, but it’s already resonating deeply. 💜

    Dr. LePera opens the book by describing what she calls the “dark night of the soul” — that rock-bottom moment when everything in your life feels misaligned and something inside you quietly says, “this can’t be it.” As I read her words, it was like reading my own story. I could feel myself in her descriptions of burnout, dread, brain fog, and emotional exhaustion. I found myself nodding and whispering, “me too.”

    🧘‍♀️ Starting with the Body

    When she said the first step in her healing was focusing on her body — movement and nutrition — I decided to follow her lead. And I’ve really been leaning into it.

    To start, I did a 45-minute Deep Stretch Yoga with Adriene session. It’s one I’ve done before, but it had been a while, and I was pleasantly surprised to notice how much progress I’ve made. I held every pose, stretched deeper than I could before, and finished feeling both grounded and proud. ✨

    After yoga, I hopped on the walk pad for another 45 minutes. I usually keep my pace at 3.0, but today I pushed myself a little — up to 3.4 — and wow, I felt it! It was that perfect mix of loving and hating it at the same time. More sweat, yes (ew), but also more endorphins. Totally worth it.

    🌬️ Walking in Silence

    As of yesterday, I have changed up my walking routine. No TV, no music, no podcasts. Just silence. Just me, my breath, and the rhythm of my steps. And, today, when I took away the distractions, my mind got loud. Without a hilarious Jim-and-Dwight prank to fill the space, old feelings started bubbling up. Anger. Frustration. Resentment from years ago.

    My first instinct was to run — to stop walking, grab a snack, turn on the TV, scroll my phone — anything to numb it out. But instead, I kept walking. I let the anger rise. I let myself feel it fully. I reminded myself that anger is a natural response to crossed boundaries. It’s not something to shame or suppress. So I breathed through it, felt it, and then… it passed. As easily as it came up, it dissolved. I honestly can’t even remember what triggered it now. It’s just gone. 🕊️

    🐾 Energy Flows Both Ways

    After my walk, I hydrated, had a protein shake, and took my vitamins. Then I decided to give both dogs a much-needed bath. Neither was thrilled, but they handled it better than usual — especially Winston. Normally, he’s nervous and strong enough to make bath time a full-body workout for me, but today, he was calmer. Maybe the calmest he has ever been for a bath. I can’t help but think he was mirroring my energy. Because I was calmer, he could be too. 🐶

    💫 Exploring Somatic Work

    I’ve been coming across the term somatic therapy a lot lately, so today I looked into it more. I found a short 7-minute beginner somatic routine on YouTube and followed along, then added Day 1 of a 30-day series for overwhelm. After that, I did a Yoga with Adriene session designed to regulate the nervous system. It was the perfect sequence — movement, breath, calm.

    Afterward, I took a hot shower, shaved my legs after a few weeks of neglecting them, and moisturized head-to-toe with my favorite body oil from Salt Soothers in Guthrie. Their products are magic. ✨ Then I put on my coziest oversized T-shirt, thick socks, and sat down to write this post — feeling clean, calm, and present.

    🌸 Real Progress

    I’ve definitely been on the struggle bus lately — and in denial about it — but today felt like a turning point. I’m starting to bring myself back to center. It feels good to nurture my body again, and I can feel my mind and spirit following along.

    I’m still struggling with sleep, and last night was rough, but I have a feeling that the more I reconnect with my body, the more that will start to heal too. I’m learning that progress doesn’t always look like productivity — sometimes, it looks like gentle consistency.

    Thank you for being here. I’m so grateful for your presence on this journey. 💜

    Love always,
    — Bailz

  • 🐢 Slow and Steady

    🐢 Slow and Steady

    Today has been a better day. I still feel a little off balance, but I can feel myself gently moving in the right direction. Little by little. I even high-fived the mirror twice this morning. 🙌

    I’m taking better care of myself, though I’ll be honest—my mind is still racing a bit.

    🩺 Scanxiety & Staying Grounded

    Yesterday afternoon, I had a CT scan with contrast dye. It’s been almost two years since my last chemotherapy treatment, and recently, a few of my old symptoms have started creeping back in. A few weeks ago, I had bloodwork done and my oncologist said everything looked good—but because of the symptoms, he ordered this scan to be safe.

    I go in for results tomorrow morning. I’m hopeful that everything is fine. But… it’s hard not to think about it. The waiting, the what-ifs, the heavy swirl of uncertainty—it’s a lot.

    So in the meantime, I’m doing my best to stay grounded, stay gentle, and keep my mind occupied with things that bring me joy.

    🛁 Cozy Comforts & Simple Wins

    Right now, self-care looks like this:

    • Wearing my comfiest clothes 🧦
    • Snuggling with the dogs 🐶
    • Watching The Office Superfan episodes 📺
    • Resting when I feel like it 💤
    • Taking a long bath while listening to The Little Book of Hygge 🕯️
    • Hydrating, eating, and staying on top of my supplements 🥤🍽️💊

    I’ve tidied the house a little—just enough to feel clear-minded—but I’m not pushing myself. I ran the robot vacuum/mop, did the dishes, and straightened up the kitchen and living room. And honestly? That’s enough for today.

    If I do more, great. If I don’t, that’s okay too.

    💜 Grace Over Guilt

    There are no expectations today. No lists, no pressure, no “shoulds.” Just soft care. Just showing up for myself in small, meaningful ways.

    My body and spirit are asking for rest, so I’m doing my best to listen. I’ll keep watching my comfort show. I’ll roll out my yoga mat for a few slow stretches. I’ll breathe deeply. I’ll try—really try—to give myself grace.

    Slow and steady. Gentle and kind. That’s the only path forward right now.

    Thanks for being here with me.

    Stay tuned for more tales from the life of Bailz 💜

  • I Like to Move It, Move It

    I Like to Move It, Move It

    One of the things I am focusing on in my journey right now is intentional movement. I’ve never been someone who worked out consistently—I never really valued what I thought it brought to my life. I didn’t like getting sweaty and I didn’t like feeling weak, and as far as I knew then, that was all that working out was. So… no, thanks.

    What I have now realized is that I was not working out in a way that worked for me. I was doing what everyone else was doing, and it wasn’t ever clicking. Because I am not like everyone else. Never have been, don’t ever want to be. Tried that, didn’t fit.

    Up until a few years ago, I had it in my head that if I was going to be in shape or work out, I needed to be a runner. So every once in a while I would decide I was going to be a runner and I would push myself and hate it and burn out and drop it—until the next time I decided to force it again. We were on a pretty much once-a-year cycle, give or take.

    Now, with my focus on looking inward for answers instead of externally, I’ve found and leaned into walking. We bought a walk pad a while ago, and over the past week I have actually been making a point to use it consistently. My current routine is: I put on New Girl and walk for 45 minutes. I take breaks as needed, and I am as gentle with myself as possible. I know that if I criticize myself, I will end up not walking anymore—and that is not what I want. I want to walk. I want to move my body with intention. So I am. No matter how many times I feel the need to stop for a water break. No matter how tired I might feel. I walk for 45 minutes total each session.

    I’m also doing yoga every day. A few years ago, I discovered Yoga with Adriene on YouTube and she changed the game for me. I sincerely adore her. First of all, she is hilarious and relatable and real. I love that—and I need that. She also has a HUGE catalog of videos and I can find something for any specific need I’m wanting to target. Thirdly, I always genuinely feel better when I get to the end of her practices. I may be tired and sore and looking extra forward to an Epsom salt bath later, but deep down, I feel good. Because I did it for ME.

    Full disclosure: when I first started with her beginner videos, I was TERRIBLE. I had zero balance and I was genuinely struggling to do all the poses and make it to the end. But ultimately, I enjoyed the videos, I enjoyed Adriene, and I enjoyed moving my body without sweating excessively. So I kept coming back—and one day, I noticed a difference in how my body moved and felt. I wasn’t wobbling during poses I had before. And that felt GOOD. I was hooked after that. I wanted to see how not wobbly I could get. I kept up with it for about six months and I could see and feel huge differences in myself. I was truly becoming a yoga girlie. Scratch that—I WAS a yoga girlie. And I felt physically in alignment with myself for the first time in a long time.

    Eventually, life happened. I lost my focus, depression and anxiety crept back into my days, and I stopped doing yoga as much—if at all. I didn’t notice the differences at first, but then I was getting knots and cricks I couldn’t remedy myself. I was needing to go to the chiropractor—and even that wasn’t really doing the trick. If you’ve struggled with anxiety and depression, you know that sometimes the pain just blends in with the rest of the shittiness, and you don’t feel motivated to change it. “Why bother?” becomes a very common refrain. At least for me. And it really sucks.

    When I buckled down and decided to commit to this healing journey, I knew that taking care of my body had to be a big part of it. Every day, whether I feel like it or not, I do a Yoga with Adriene video or my own practice based on what I’ve learned from her. I’m not requiring myself to walk on the walk pad every day, but I am requiring yoga every day. Even if it’s just 10 minutes. Sometimes 5 if I’m really not feeling it—like on Day 1 of my period. You will not catch me doing a full hour practice on Day 1 of my period. It ain’t happening, bro. But I can manage 5–10 minutes of slow, intentional flow.

    I know my body and mind benefit from it. I know it’s contributing to my well-being. And I know if I let myself skip once, it’ll be easier to skip again—and I’m really working on keeping promises to myself. This one especially.

    Through all of my self-reflection recently, I’ve realized that when I worked out before, I was doing it so I could tell people I worked out and hopefully they’d be impressed. It had nothing to do with the benefits to my body or spirit. I only cared about the bragging rights. And thus, it never became a real habit. It was only when I realized that I was worthy of taking care of that it finally stuck. That part might’ve been the hardest.

    I still have to make myself do yoga and walk—but it’s not as hard, and it’s definitely not as forced. I know that as soon as I get started, I’ll be happy I did. The hardest part is always getting started.

    Up until now, I’ve been practicing and walking in the afternoons, but I’d like to move it into my mornings going forward. Starting tomorrow, my goal is to get on the walk pad within 30 minutes of waking, and then do yoga after that. Hopefully the momentum will carry me through the day with a heightened energy level.

    I’ll let you know how tomorrow goes.

    Thank you for being here! Stay tuned for more tales from the life of Bailz.