Bailz Has a Blog

Tag: wintering era

  • 🌿 Feeling Better, Moving Slower, Learning More

    🌿 Feeling Better, Moving Slower, Learning More

    ✨ Hey, hi, hello! Happy Monday!

    GREAT NEWS! I am finally starting to feel better and holy cow I am so grateful! To be able to breathe out of both nostrils at the same time… what a blessing! 😅

    When I really think back on it with absolute honesty, I have been feeling some version of sick for the past couple of weeks. Whether it be actual cold symptoms like a sore throat or congestion, or just that “pre-sick feeling” of being overly tired and cranky and sluggish. I just haven’t felt like myself in quite some time. Longer than I wanted to admit before. I’m stubborn like that. I fly my “I’m fine, it’s just allergies” flag like it’s my job. 🚩

    But now I can fully acknowledge and admit that I have been fluctuating between the two phases — the “pre-sick feeling” and the actual symptoms — for weeks now.

    🌿 Holistic Remedies + The Moment I Finally Accepted Help

    Up until this past Friday, I really was not giving myself the space and grace to simply rest. I was doing all of my natural, holistic treatments/remedies, but I was not giving my body the rest it needed to be able to heal. I was pushing myself to just get through it. On top of that, I was also completely refusing to take any over-the-counter drugs.

    I am definitely more of an all-natural girlie, especially when it comes to treating illnesses. If there is a natural remedy for something, I am trying that first. And most of the time, it works… but sometimes I need the help of the high-powered stuff and, whether I liked it or not, this was one of those times.

    On Saturday, Heath went to CVS for me and got me some Mucinex D. I’m not gonna lie — I was pretty pissed that it was coming to this. I really hate taking that kind of stuff. Through all my herbalism and holistic research, I just know too much about the chemicals they use in those things and I have a really hard time willingly consuming them.

    But my congestion had gotten so bad that I wasn’t able to sleep very much, and the times when I was finally able to doze off, it was very sporadic and inconsistent. I was waking up feeling the same as I did before I slept. That was no good.

    I knew something had to give, so I begrudgingly agreed to take at least one dose and see how I felt. Within an hour, I was able to breathe through my nose again and I felt everything in my head become unclogged.

    Sweet, sweet relief! 🙌

    I still kept up with all my holistic treatments too — nasal rinses, flu bomb tea (freshly minced garlic, cayenne pepper, freshly minced ginger, lemon juice, honey, sea salt, warm water), hot showers, peppermint and eucalyptus essential oils, castor oil, baths with Dead Sea salts and apple cider vinegar, and finally… resting, resting, resting.

    I took two doses of Mucinex on Saturday and two doses on Sunday, and today I am feeling so much better that I haven’t taken any! It is pretty exciting, not gonna lie. 😄

    🛌 Resting Without Guilt (A Rare and Beautiful Thing)

    Saturday and Sunday I rested without guilt more than I have in any recent memory. I cannot remember a time before then when I was sick or just tired and rested without feeling like I should be doing something else… without telling myself I was weak… without telling myself I was lazy and useless and a waste of space.

    But I was able to do that this weekend. I was able to sleep in and snuggle on the couch and nap — all without thinking about doing anything else. I just fully committed to resting and it absolutely paid off. 💛

    One of my biggest struggles when I start to feel better after being sick is doing too much too fast and then throwing myself right back into it. So today, even though I want to do a lot because I am so excited to be feeling better, I am forcing myself to keep resting.

    I want to start on some house projects and dive back into all of my exercise routines, but I know that if I do all of that today, I will be back to feeling crappy by tomorrow without a doubt.

    So the most I am allowing myself today is to get back on the walk pad and walk SLOWLY. I don’t even want to break a sweat. I just want to move gently. The closet that needs to be organized will still be there tomorrow — and the day after that too. 😌

    I really want this wellness to stick around, so I will be gentle with myself as much as possible.

    📚 Reading for Pleasure Again

    I finished A Winter’s Promise on Saturday and immediately started reading the next book in the series, The Missing of Clairdelune. It is bringing me quite a lot of simple joy right now.

    I kinda forgot what it was like to read simply for pleasure. Even before my happiness project and restricting what I was reading, I had lost sight of the joy of reading for pleasure. I was going for quantity over quality and I didn’t even realize it until just recently.

    For a few years, I was tracking everything I read on Goodreads and trying to log as many books as I could as fast as I could like it was some sort of competition. In 2024, I logged 77 books. WHAT?! That is kind of insane. 😳

    I was rushing through each book so I could get to the next one, and I honestly didn’t even realize it at the time. I was so caught up in the numbers that I lost sight of the pleasure of the activity. I was trying to be impressive — I wanted to tell people how many books I read and have them think, “wow, that Bailz sure is good at reading, I like her!”

    Like pretty much everything else in my life, it became more about what other people thought than it was about how it made me feel — what I thought about it. And yet, I had no idea at the time. I never let myself slow down enough to even think about it. I just kept pushing.

    Now that I am really leaning into my wintering phase and trying to slow down in all areas, reading has been a main priority in that regard. I am focusing on taking my time with each page and making sure I’m actually enjoying the stories I’m absorbing — because that is the whole point, not checking a box and adding to a tally.

    I’m not in any rush… or at least I’m trying really hard not to be. Admittedly, my instinct is still to rush. It has been my default for so long, so I know it will take time to unlearn. But I’m actively trying to quiet that urge — to silence that inner voice that says, “hurry up! go faster! there is so much to do! go! go! go!”

    It’s a work in progress, but I’m proud of myself for acknowledging the problem and addressing it head on. ✨

    🎶 Comfort Shows, Music Stories & Childlike Joy

    Some other things that have been bringing happiness into my days recently are The End of an Era, the Taylor Swift documentary series, and The Beatles Anthology documentary series — both on Disney+.

    Music is truly one of my favorite things in life. Always has been, always will be. Watching behind-the-scenes footage and hearing stories about how some of my favorite musicians do what they do best brings such joy and warmth to my heart.

    I find myself genuinely smiling as I watch and it feels pretty dang great. With each episode, I feel myself coming back to myself a little bit more. I am experiencing the childlike joy that for so long has eluded me.

    I am taking care of my inner child a little bit better with each day and I have to admit… it’s pretty beautiful. 🥹💜

    🌙 Sleeping More, Listening More, Trusting More

    Beyond that, I am really focusing on sleeping A LOT. I am not paying attention to the clock, I am paying attention to my body and so far it seems to be working out pretty well.

    I will get back to my sleep schedule with more discipline soon, but not until I am feeling 100% again. Depriving myself of rest is just not in the cards right now. That is part of wintering. That is part of healing. That is part of my journey right now.

    So I am leaning into it as much as I can.

    ❄️ Slow and Steady

    Slow and steady wins the race. My wintering phase is in full swing right now and it feels really good.

    I am taking my time with everything I can and though it may not be glamorous or exciting, I know it is absolutely necessary if I want to make any sustainable progress going forward.

    So I will keep on keeping on — taking everything one step at a time, and giving myself as much grace as possible. 💛

    💬 A Question for You

    What’s one small way you can slow down today and be gentle with yourself — even if your brain tries to tell you to rush? 🤍

    ✨ Want to Follow Along?

    If you enjoyed this post and want to keep following along with my wintering era, healing journey, and all the little comfort-filled moments in between, I’d love for you to subscribe below.

    You’ll get an email whenever a new post goes live — no spam, just honest reflections, real life, and a little bit of cozy magic. 💜

    Love always,
    Bailz 💜

  • Comfort, Colds & Wintering Check-Ins

    Comfort, Colds & Wintering Check-Ins

    ✨ Hey, hi, hello! Happy Friday!

    I wanted to give a little check-in from my wintering. I am currently fighting a cold/upper respiratory bug, which I fully believe is my body telling me: “Okay, you won’t slow down on your own? I’ll do it for you.” 🤧

    And while I’m kinda frustrated… I’m also grateful for the extra push. The past week has been a lot slower than any of the rest of this process has been, and it feels really weird, but I know it’s needed. 🕯️

    📚 “Wintering” Was the Permission Slip I Didn’t Know I Needed

    I finished reading Wintering by Katherine May the other day and I cannot recommend it enough. It genuinely feels like it was the permission slip to truly slow down I didn’t know I needed.

    It has really helped me shift my perspective around this phase I’m going through and shed some of the shame I’ve been feeling about my non-linear growth. 💛

    🧭 Learning What Brings Me Joy (And What Doesn’t)

    One thing I am really focusing on is learning what brings me joy and what does not.

    Earlier this week, I decided I was going to curl up and watch season 2 of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. I watched Season 1 when it came out and enjoyed it then, but I’ve been so focused on other things that I didn’t even realize there were two new seasons out now.

    With my new focus on rest and slowing down, I thought this would be a perfect opportunity to indulge… but I got an episode and a half in and then I had to turn it off. It was triggering my anxiety in a way I hadn’t felt in a while, so I said: “No, thank you.”

    There is plenty of other content out there I can enjoy without triggering my fight-or-flight response. 🫶

    Instead, I switched over to watching Good Hang with Amy Poehler on YouTube. Since it launched earlier this year, I’ve watched a few episodes here and there, but not with any real consistency.

    Over the last few days, however, I’ve watched a bunch of different episodes and it has felt like a hug to my heart. This show is indeed perfectly named. Each episode feels like a good hang with good friends — and that has been bringing me a lot of joy right now. 🥹💜

    📖 A Cozy Read That’s Just for Me

    I am also reading A Winter’s Promise by Christelle Dabos and I am really enjoying that as well.

    When I first started it a couple of weeks ago, I admittedly had a hard time getting into it and reading consistently. But now I think that had less to do with the story itself and more to do with the internal story I was telling myself.

    I think I was still shaming myself for reading something that wasn’t going to teach me anything about my journey. But now that I am slowing down and giving myself space and time to heal, focusing on finding the joy, and just being present with myself… I am really, really enjoying this book. ✨

    It is the first book in a four-part series and I am looking forward to reading all of it.

    😴 Rest Without Rigid Rules

    I am sleeping a lot more these days — partly because I feel icky fighting off this cold, and partly because my soul just needs more rest in general.

    I am letting go of the rigidity and letting myself sleep when I am tired. I am still trying to go to bed and wake up at the same time, but I am also letting myself be flexible with it as needed.

    The set sleep and wake times I have are goals and guidelines, not punishments or restrictions. 🌙

    🛁 Comfort as a Practice

    I am feeling really proud of myself for finally exploring life through a slower, less urgent lens. It’s definitely a process to let go of the strictness and rigidity, but I am working on it and it feels good. 🤍

    I am really leaning into comfort these days:

    • Taking lots of baths, soaking in salts and oils to soothe my body and my soul 🛁
    • Taking extra hot showers to let the steam open up my sinuses 🚿
    • Drinking a lot of water and electrolytes to help flush everything out 💧
    • Exclusively wearing comfy clothes — leggings, big t-shirts, long cardigans, and cozy socks 🧦

    I did some yoga with Heath last night, but we kept it light with a slow, restorative practice — and it felt nice to get back on the mat in a manageable and meaningful way. 🧘‍♀️

    I haven’t been on the walk pad in a few days and while I do miss it, I know my body needs to be resting right now. I’ll get back to it when I’m physically feeling better.

    Maybe I can get back on tomorrow and just keep it really slow, so I am moving with intention but not overexerting myself. But I am going to listen to my body and go with the flow because I know that is what is needed right now. 🌿

    ❄️ That’s My Check-In for Now

    And that’s about it — that’s all I’ve got for ya right now. I really don’t feel like I have a whole lot to say today, but that’s okay.

    I still wanted to show up and check in and update you all where I am right now. I am very much wintering, and it’s not glamorous or exciting… but it is necessary. 🕯️

    💬 A Question for You

    What’s bringing you comfort right now — a show, a book, a ritual, a cozy routine?
    If you feel like sharing, tell me in the comments. I’d love to know what’s helping you soften and breathe this season. 🤍

    ✨ Want to Follow Along?

    If you enjoyed this post and want to keep following along with my wintering era — the healing, the slowing down, the small joys, and the honest check-ins — I’d love for you to subscribe.

    You’ll get an email whenever a new post goes live (no spam, just the good stuff). Thank you for being here. It means the world to me. 💜

    Love always,
    Bailz 💜