Bailz Has a Blog

Tag: Healthy Habits

  • 🌿 Expansion & Contraction

    🌿 Expansion & Contraction

    Hey, hi, hello! Happy Friday!

    It’s been a while since my last post. The past month or so brought a wave of depression that knocked me off my footing for a bit. I lost my rhythm for a while, but I am starting to come back to myself and I finally feel ready to return to this space and share again.

    🌊 The Rhythm of Healing

    At the start of the year, I was in a season of expansion.

    I was making meaningful progress in therapy, showing up to yoga twice a week, and really stepping into my independence and personal power.

    And then, like clockwork, contraction arrived.

    Even though I know contraction is natural, necessary, and part of the deal when it comes to healing, it was still hard to accept while I was in it. I knew it would pass. I knew it was temporary. But that didn’t make it any less difficult.

    🖤 Feeling It All

    Something I’ve noticed since starting this healing journey is that my awareness has expanded significantly. And with that expanded awareness came deeper, more intense emotional experiences.

    I am no longer numbing out or turning away from the hard feelings. I am actually feeling them. And this time around, it hit harder because of that.

    It knocked me on my ass for a bit, if I’m being honest.

    The upside is that I now have more tools than ever before. I was able to move through it faster than I ever have in the past, and that feels like real progress.

    🧠 When the Past Comes Knocking

    Here’s what I think really happened.

    As I worked on healing my present self, I created space. And that space invited past versions of me to come forward and finally be heard.

    And they were not subtle about it.

    At the time those experiences originally happened, I didn’t have the capacity to fully process them. So I avoided, suppressed, numbed, and buried them. Drugs, alcohol, distraction, all of it.

    But those emotions do not just disappear. They wait. And when it is finally safe enough, they rise.

    So as I stepped out of burnout and into healing, everything I had buried came back up to the surface.

    Honestly, it felt like an emotional zombie apocalypse.

    My bestie, Ryann, sent me this video a few weeks ago, and it helped me understand what was happening in a way that really clicked. I shared it with Heath too, and he found it helpful.

    Here it is in case it resonates with you as well:

    🧘‍♀️ Showing Up Anyway

    Even though this past month was heavy, I still showed up for myself in the ways that mattered most.

    Even on the days I wasn’t feeling it, I made it to yoga. I kept my back to back classes, one hour of hot vinyasa followed by one hour of restorative.

    I kept every therapy appointment.

    I kept every chiropractic appointment.

    And most importantly, I stayed sober, even when things felt the heaviest. It has been 147 days since my last drink, 158 days since I last smoked, and I am incredibly proud of myself for that.

    That matters more than anything.

    Of course, not everything stayed perfectly on track. My sleep schedule has been all over the place again, staying up late and sleeping in. And naturally, my eating schedule has followed suit.

    As I come out of this fog, getting my sleep and nutrition back into alignment feels like my biggest priority.

    🌸 Gentle Rebuilding

    I am also being very intentional about how I approach this next phase.

    I know by now that being hard on myself does not work. Being critical does not create sustainable change. It just creates more resistance.

    So I am choosing softness.

    I am choosing patience.

    I am choosing to trust the process.

    I will get back to my ideal routines. Maybe not overnight, maybe not even this week. But little by little, I will get there.

    🔔 Moments That Shifted Something

    Last weekend, Heath and I went to a sound bath at my yoga studio, and it was incredible.

    Neither of us had ever done one before, and we both left feeling lighter, both physically and energetically.

    Heath has been dealing with a shoulder injury for over a year, and afterward he had more range of motion and less pain than he has had in a long time. He went in skeptical and came out a believer.

    For me, it felt like the clouds started to part. I went in feeling heavy and disconnected, and I walked out feeling more present, more grounded, and more like myself.

    Then Wednesday came.

    I had my yearly oncology check up, and I am so happy to say that all of my bloodwork came back healthy and I am still cancer free. 🤍

    I will go back in December for another scan, but for now, I am in the clear.

    Heath took the day off to come with me, and we ended up spending the whole day together. We had brunch, went to the chiropractor, drove around listening to music, and he even came with me to restorative yoga that evening.

    Something about that day felt like a turning point. The sound bath cleared the fog, and Wednesday felt like the beginning of rebuilding.

    ✨ Stepping Into Something New

    This week, I also started a six week online Reiki course, and I am so excited about it.

    For anyone unfamiliar, Reiki is a Japanese energy healing practice that supports the body’s natural healing processes, reduces stress, and promotes relaxation and overall wellbeing.

    It is something I have been curious about for a long time, and I finally felt ready to say yes to it.

    I am really proud of myself for investing in my healing in this way.

    🌱 Moving Forward

    Right now, I feel more like myself again. I feel hopeful. I feel grounded. I feel ready to expand again.

    And I also know that contraction will come back at some point. That is just part of the rhythm.

    But I trust myself more now. I trust that I can move through it with more awareness, more compassion, and more resilience each time.

    This cycle was hard, but I handled it better than I ever have before.

    I did not run from it.

    I did not numb it.

    I sat with it. I felt it. I honored it.

    And now, I am ready for what comes next.

    💜 A Little Reminder

    Healing is not linear. It never has been.

    There will be highs and lows, expansions and contractions, clarity and confusion. That is all part of the journey.

    Be gentle with yourself. Trust yourself. You will make it through.

    I love you all. Thank you for being here with me, and thank you for your patience while I took a step back.

    I am really excited to be writing again.

    Love always,
    Bailz 💜

  • ✨ Finding the Quiet Kind of Good ✨

    ✨ Finding the Quiet Kind of Good ✨

    Hey, hi, hello! Happy Tuesday!

    I wasn’t entirely sure what I wanted to talk about today, but I knew I wanted to show up. I’ve been wanting to get back into the rhythm of posting every other day—if not daily—and the only way to do that is to simply begin. So here we are, letting the words reveal themselves as they come.

    🌙 A Night Out & a Small but Honest Lesson

    This weekend, Heath and I got dressed up and went out to a lovely dinner at Wicked Butcher in downtown Fort Worth. The whole experience felt luxurious—perfectly crafted dishes, top-tier service, and even cucumber-infused water that tasted like spa-day elegance in a glass.

    When we arrived, I slipped off to the restroom to freshen up. By the time I returned, there were two glasses of complimentary champagne at our table—courtesy of the reservation note saying we were celebrating our (belated) wedding. It was a beautiful gesture.

    I hesitated. And then I made a decision: life is for living, and I wanted to celebrate us. So I toasted with Heath and enjoyed the small glass of champagne.

    After that, I stuck to mocktails (a fresh blackberry lemonade that was chef’s kiss) and water.

    Later that night, though, I woke up with spiraling anxiety over absolutely nothing. My muscles were clenched, my breath shallow, my mind sprinting like it was running in circles in the dark.

    That tiny bit of alcohol—that tiny bit—still affected me.

    Here’s what I realized afterward:

    • I don’t regret the moment. It was lovely.
    • But even a small amount is too much for my system.
    • Going forward, I’m done with alcohol entirely.

    Not from shame. Not from punishment. But from self-respect. Alcohol simply isn’t worth the cost to my nervous system or my peace.

    🧘‍♀️ Moving My Body, Loving My Body

    The past few days have gently brought me back into my movement routines. I’m walking daily on the walk pad and doing yoga every day—and it feels GOOD. Not dramatic, not performative. Just good.

    Some days I move fast. Some days I move slow. Some days it’s a long yoga flow. Some days it’s 10 minutes.

    But movement is movement. Showing up is showing up. And I’m proud of every version of myself that steps onto the mat or walk pad.

    😴 Sleep Schedule Chaos (And a Loving Reset)

    Sleep has been a little chaotic. Staying up later has made my whole routine slide later—breakfast, lunch, dinner, and my nighttime wind-down. Everything shifts together like dominoes, and I feel the effects.

    Last night, I stayed up way past my bedtime finishing Shout! I was so entranced that I didn’t even realize the time until I closed the book and saw it was past midnight.

    So this morning, I let myself sleep in to compensate. Tonight, the goal is to get back on my 9–9:15 bedtime and lights out by 10.

    Structure can be loving. Flexibility can be loving, too. I’m learning to hold both.

    💜 Therapy & Solo Costco Adventures

    I have therapy this afternoon and I’m excited. Last time, I walked in feeling drained, so we spent the hour getting me grounded again. Today, we’re diving into new tools and practices to help me step deeper into authenticity—my biggest long-term goal.

    After therapy, I’m doing my first solo Costco run in years, and honestly? I’m thrilled. I plan to walk each aisle slowly and treat the whole thing like a mindfulness exercise instead of a chaotic errand.

    🌤️ The Quiet Kind of Good

    Today, I feel good—not energized, not buzzing, not high on productivity. Just quietly calm. The kind of good I think I’ve been searching for my whole life. The kind that measures worth not by output but by inner softness.

    I could do a few chores around the house today, and I might. But I don’t have to. I am certainly not going to force them.

    Whatever version of today unfolds, I will choose it intentionally and without pressure.

    💬 Your Turn!

    What’s one small, gentle thing you’ve done for yourself recently that brought you a sense of calm or peace?

    ✨ Want More Posts Like This?

    If you’re enjoying following along on my healing and happiness journey, I’d love to have you subscribe so you never miss a new post. 💜 Pop your email into the box below and grow with me as we learn, rest, heal, and gently transform together.

    Love always,
    Bailz 💜

  • 🌿 A Day for Big Bailz Wins 🤗

    🌿 A Day for Big Bailz Wins 🤗

    Hey, hi, hello! Happy Tuesday!

    🌙 The Sleep of Dreams (Literally!)

    Okay. First things first. YOU GUYS — I SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT! I went to sleep a little before 10 and didn’t wake up until 6am! I GOT A FULL 8 HOURS, YO! I genuinely cannot think of another time in recent history when that has happened, and I am just beyond excited.

    Last week, after realizing that my 3am wake-ups could be associated with issues with the liver, I purchased some peppermint leaves, milk thistle, and dandelion root — all three connected to supporting liver health — and I’ve been experimenting with tea blends each night about 1–2 hours before bed. I think they’ve been helping a lot. 🍵

    At first, I didn’t even realize I had made it through the night because I’ve stopped checking the clock when I wake up. All it does is stress me out. Plus, the light from my watch or phone doesn’t help anything. So now, if I wake up, I keep my eye mask on and focus on falling back asleep. This morning, I only realized what had happened when I heard the dogs getting up — and when I finally checked my watch, I was thrilled to see it was 6am. I still am. 😴✨

    💃 A Major Confidence Milestone

    And the wins didn’t stop there. This morning, I had an appointment — not just any appointment, but a wardrobe consultation for a boudoir photo shoot I finally scheduled for myself after years of self-denial. 👏

    This is something I’ve always wanted to do but constantly talked myself out of. I told myself it was silly, that I shouldn’t spend money on something like that, that I’d be judged or made fun of. I told myself a lot of negative things — mostly that I didn’t deserve to do what I wanted to do.

    But now, as I’ve been diving so deeply into this self-healing journey, I realized this is exactly the time to check that dream off my list. So last Thursday, I started researching local boudoir photographers. After some digging, I found one whose work perfectly matched the vibe I envisioned. Without overthinking it, I filled out the contact form and sent it off before I could talk myself out of it. I even told her about my healing journey and that this shoot was something I was doing for me (okay, yes, Heath’s excited too 😜, but ultimately, this is for me!).

    The next day, we hopped on a call to discuss details, and by the end of it, I had officially booked and prepaid for the shoot so there would be no backing out. I’m committed, baby! I booked, I paid, and then I cried real tears of pride. 🥹💜

    🪞 Facing the Mirror (and My Inner Critic)

    So today, I went in for my wardrobe consultation to try on outfit options for the shoot. And let me tell you, that mirror moment came with some inner critic commentary. My body looks different than it did a few months ago — I’ve been nourishing myself properly for the first time in a long time, and my shape is changing. It’s healthy, but it’s still an adjustment.

    When I looked in the mirror, I could hear her — that old familiar voice — whispering: “Your tummy isn’t flat anymore.” “Look at your thighs, that cellulite!” “You’re so big now.” For the first couple of minutes, I believed her. It’s hard not to when you’re standing half-naked in a new place, trying on lingerie. But then I made eye contact with myself and paused. I took a breath. I remembered the truth.

    My body is healthy. My body is nourished. My body is strong. 💪

    I used to starve it — sometimes intentionally, sometimes through neglect. But not anymore. Now I eat well, I move, I rest, I nurture myself. And yes, that means I look different. That’s something to celebrate. I’m feeding my body with love, and it’s showing me gratitude in return. ❤️

    So yeah, I’m celebrating this new, healthy body of mine next week with a sexy photo shoot — and I could not be more proud. I can’t wait to see how I feel on the day, or when I get the photos back. The best is yet to come. 🌸

    🗳️ And One More Win…

    After my appointment, I went to the community center by my house and voted! WOO! 🇺🇸

    The lovely women running the polling station were absolute gems — so kind and sweet. They complimented my sweater and boots, which completely made my day. Their warmth was contagious and left me smiling all the way home.

    🥗 Nourished and Happy

    Once home, I made myself a Mediterranean-style chopped salad I’ve been dreaming about for a while: sautéed tomatoes with garlic in avocado oil, mixed with chopped Kalamata olives, feta, cucumber, black beans, apple cider vinegar, lemon juice, extra virgin olive oil, sea salt, and pepper.

    It was delicious — even better than I expected. And I can’t wait to make it again soon!

    💜 Grateful for the Good Days

    Today was a very good day — full of big Bailz wins. I’m showing up for myself, doing the work even when I don’t feel like it, and it’s bringing me days like this: days where I feel giddy, proud, and genuinely happy to be alive. For so long, that feeling felt impossible. But it’s here now, and I’m soaking it in.

    Here’s to the big wins, the little wins, and every moment in between. Thank you for being here with me on this journey — it means the world. 🌙

    Love always,
    Bailz 💜

    PS – If this post made you smile, or reminded you to be a little kinder to yourself today, subscribe below. 💜

    Let’s keep growing together — one small win, one proud step, one healed piece at a time. 🌿

  • 🥦 Food is Medicine

    🥦 Food is Medicine

    I have really been leaning into my nutrition recently and it’s starting to feel really good. I feel like I am taking control of my diet instead of just going along with what is easiest or what will satisfy a craving in the moment. Not only am I feeling better physically, but that sense of accomplishment is really helping me feel better mentally too.

    I’m still letting myself have some of my favorite things — but in very small portions, all in moderation. I’m trying to stick to an 80/20 ratio: 80% of the time, I’m eating very clean and intentionally, and 20% of the time, I’m snacking on Trader Joe’s Chili Lime chips, having some chips and queso, or indulging in a little Ben & Jerry’s. 🍦

    Those little treats serve as comfort food. While I’ll admit that, in a perfect world, I’d eliminate them all for the sake of perfect health, I also find that complete restriction is a recipe for backsliding. So for now, I’m keeping my balance as is. I’m feeling significantly better these days, and I know a lot of it has to do with the food I’m giving my body.

    🍎 Discovering Bobby Parrish & Intentional Eating

    My journey toward a healthier body really started about six months ago. We discovered Bobby Parrish on YouTube after getting a Costco membership and looking for suggestions on what to buy. Let me tell you — Bobby has been a game changer.

    Not only does he highlight the best deals at Costco (and other stores too), he also shows you the healthiest options to buy there. He explains which ingredients to avoid and points you toward the best products for your body and your health. 🛒

    He even does the legwork for you when you’re shopping. He has his own app that lets you scan barcodes of hundreds of thousands of grocery items to see if they’re “Bobby Approved.” Search for the Bobby Approved app in the App Store — if you’re interested in being more intentional with what you eat, I highly recommend using it on your next grocery trip.

    🚫 Natural Flavors, Seed Oils, and Other Sneaky Ingredients

    One of the biggest things we’ve learned from Bobby is about the ingredient “natural flavors.” At first glance, it sounds harmless, right? WRONG. For something to be labeled “natural flavors,” all manufacturers have to do is start with a natural source — and then they can process and manipulate it however they want before it ends up in your food.

    They’re highly processed in labs, and just because they’re derived from natural ingredients doesn’t mean they’re good for you — or even harmless. Bobby calls “natural flavors” the biggest lie in the grocery store, and honestly… I believe him. 😬

    Once you start looking for them, you’ll realize they’re in everything. So we’ve been checking our products for natural flavors and limiting our intake. We’re also avoiding seed oils, which sneak into almost everything too. 🤢

    Learning from Bobby has helped us slow down, read labels, and be truly intentional with what we’re putting into our bodies. And once you start paying attention, it’s almost impossible to go back to ignoring it.

    🌿 When the Student Is Ready, the Teacher Appears

    You’ve heard the saying, “When the student is ready, the teacher appears”? Well, I think that’s true. I’ve been focusing on nutrition lately, and then — like magic — Mel Robbins released a new episode of her podcast featuring Dr. Dawn Mussallem, a Mayo Clinic cancer doctor. They talked all about the foods that support longevity and fight disease — and it was fascinating. 🎧

    This student was ready to learn! Dr. Mussallem broke down the science behind different foods and how incorporating them into your diet can not only promote health but actually fight cancer. 🍇🥬 Food really is medicine.

    As a former cancer patient myself, I find it wild that none of my medical team ever mentioned nutrition during chemo. Not once. But that’s a conversation for another day.

    I’ve already gone back to rewatch the episode on YouTube because it was that good — and Dr. Mussallem’s enthusiasm is contagious. Within the past week, I’ve started adding some of her recommendations into my routine. For example, I’m now eating a kiwi every day (with the skin!) 🥝 and I tried purple sweet potatoes for the first time — and oh WOW, they’re delicious. Like… unfairly good.

    💜 Learning to Prioritize Myself

    Before this journey, I was all about convenience and speed. I didn’t want to spend time cooking or cleaning up after. I’d talk myself out of it before I even began. But now, I’m reinforcing a new belief: I’m worth the effort. Preparing a nourishing meal is worth the time — and honestly, it never takes as long as I make it out to be in my head.

    When I sit down to eat something I made with care, I feel like a freaking rockstar. 🌟 I’m proud of myself — and that’s a feeling I didn’t have for a long time, because I wasn’t prioritizing self-care. But now I am. The tides are shifting, the momentum is building, and I’m continuing to create a healthier, happier life — one meal at a time. 🍽️

    Thank you for being here and following along on this journey. I’m so grateful for your company and your kind words of encouragement. 💫

    Love always, Bailz 💜

    🌸 Thanks so much for reading! If you enjoy these posts about wellness, self-discovery, and everyday growth, subscribe below so you never miss a new story — or a new lesson learned the hard way. 😉

  • 🌞 I Woke Up Not Sweaty This Morning!

    🌞 I Woke Up Not Sweaty This Morning!

    YOU GUYS — I WOKE UP NOT SWEATY THIS MORNING!!!

    Wow. Just… wow. I am so excited. Truly.

    I still woke up tired and wishing I could go right back to sleep, but the excitement of head-to-toe bodily dryness (!!!) got me up and out of bed within minutes of my alarm going off. HELL FREAKING YES. That is a win! 🙌

    A lot of work has gone into this big change, and I’m excited to share what I’ve been doing.

    🍸 Let’s Start with Alcohol

    First things first: I haven’t been drinking — not even one cocktail a night. I might try again this weekend, but for now, my new rule is no alcohol during the week. My last drink was on Monday night.

    🍳 Refueling My Body

    I’ve also started really focusing on eating enough. Honestly, this has been a lifelong challenge. My appetite fluctuates, and I’ve never been consistent about nourishing myself throughout the day.

    But now that I’m focusing on healing my body one step at a time, a new day has dawned — and food is a priority. My main focus right now is making sure I get enough protein every day, while keeping balance and intention.

    That means:

    • minimal processed foods,
    • no ingredients I can’t pronounce,
    • no dyes, artificial sweeteners, or “natural flavors.”

    Just real food, 80% of the time. The other 20%? Whatever makes life sweet — like Ben & Jerry’s. Because a life without ice cream? Not interested. 🍦

    💊 Supplements That Are Working

    I’ve been super consistent with my supplements lately.

    Recently, we discovered Just Ingredients and love how clean their products are — no fillers, and they list exactly where their vitamins and minerals come from. For example, their multivitamin’s Vitamin A comes from fermented wild carrot fruit extract. How cool is that?

    Here’s what my current regimen looks like:

    🥛 Breakfast:

    • 8 oz organic grass-fed milk
    • 1 scoop Just Ingredients Chocolate protein powder
    • 1 scoop Orgain Collagen Peptides

    💊 Morning Supplements:

    • Seed Probiotics (2)
    • Just Ingredients Adrenal Complex (2)
    • Just Ingredients Perimenopause (2)
    • Just Ingredients Multivitamin (2)
    • Now Vitamin D-3 2000 IU (2)

    🌙 Evening Supplements:

    • Now Magnesium Glycinate (2)
    • Solgar Evening Primrose Oil 1300 mg (1)

    🌙 Building a Bedtime Routine

    I honestly can’t remember the last time I had a solid bedtime and morning routine that stuck. Maybe elementary school?

    By fifth grade, I was already lying awake worrying about everything under the sun. As I got older, homework and perfectionism kept me up later and later. Sleep was always secondary. No wonder burnout has followed me my whole life.

    Now, I’m changing that story.

    Starting at 8 PM, I begin signaling to my body that it’s time to wind down:

    • Overhead lights off.
    • Phone on Do Not Disturb.
    • Soft, relaxing music on. 🎶

    Then I make my nighttime drink — Just Ingredients Chai — with milk for a little protein boost, plus a scoop of Orgain Creatine. It’s so good. This is also when I take my nighttime supplements.

    After that:

    • Wash face, brush teeth.
    • Run a hot bath, and do a short Yoga with Adriene bedtime session while the water fills up.
    • Soak for 30 minutes.
    • Rinse off with cold water to cool down.
    • Get into bed and read until 10 PM lights out.

    🛏️ Small Wins Add Up

    Last night, the routine was slightly off — Heath stopped at Costco on the way home, so dinner was late. But even with the delay, I still started my routine as soon as I could and was chasing sleep by 10:15. That’s a win.

    I did wake around 1:30 AM (thank you, Winston & Wrigley 🙄), but I fell back asleep quickly and slept through the rest of the night.

    When my alarm went off, I was tempted to hit snooze, but I didn’t. I got up — still very tired, but still moving forward. And it worked. I even had enough energy to put on a cute fall outfit for my chiropractor appointment. Normally it’s leggings and a big tee, but today? Shorts, tights, boots, cozy sweater — and I felt like me again.

    💆‍♀️ Chiropractic Progress

    I’ve now had four adjustments, and the difference is noticeable. Yesterday we discovered a dislocated rib (which explains that weird “spilling out” feeling), and now we’re working on getting it back in place. My muscles are adjusting, my body is realigning — it’s wild and fascinating all at once.

    💜 Learning to Be Proud

    I know I still have a ways to go. I’ll slip up sometimes — I’m human. But today? I’m proud of myself.

    I’m showing up, even when I don’t want to. I’m doing the work. And I’m starting to see the benefits, both physically and mentally.

    For me to even say that out loud — and mean it — is huge. I used to tear myself down before anyone else could. If I did something well, I’d downplay it. If I felt happy, I’d call it a fluke.

    But not today.

    Today, I’m letting myself celebrate.
    I’m letting myself be proud.
    And it feels really, really good. 🌸

    🌸 Wrapping It All Up

    This season of life feels like one long lesson in patience, self-trust, and grace. Every little win — every dry morning, every deep breath, every night I keep my promise to myself — reminds me that change is possible when it’s rooted in love instead of pressure.

    I know I still have work to do, but I’m finally learning to enjoy the process instead of rushing toward the finish line. Healing isn’t linear; it’s a dance of progress and pause, effort and ease. And right now, I’m just grateful to be dancing at all.

    Thank you for being here with me through it — for reading, cheering, and walking alongside me while I figure this all out, one mindful step at a time.

    Love always, Bailz 💜

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